Footing the bill...a fight with our largest bank.

The whole process could be succintly summed up as "a black hole of time and energy" but even so, there have been two items that more than the rest, define "large spend" and "headache".

One is finding a contractor and settling on a renovation plan. This was where I realized that I'd made a grave mistake in getting a new apartment and given my picky tastes and want for more space, combined with the still-lower construction and labour costs in Singapore, I would have been far better served finding an old place or an old house, tearing it to bits and starting over.

The second is settling a mortgage, or in this case, renegotiating and repricing an existing loan. Would you believe that in the last two years of the worst credit crisis the modern world has faced...the so called Value Mortgage Rate has not moved from 4%?

Just standing still, the mortgage bill would be 4.25% versus a SIBOR of 1.5%, how ridiculous is That scenario? I'm sure this is not an isolated case, still, going back to the bank was also a lesson in itself. The three takeaways were 1. You must know more than your banker who cannot be trusted 2. Anything is possible and negotiable, know your desired outcome and 3. Read, read, read before you sign.

I've been negligient about dealing with it in a timely manner but I finally went back to the bank. They had devised some packages for people who wanted to re-price their loans, one with a penalty fee and the second with a cash rebate offsetting the penalty fee (1% rebate to offset 1% penalty) but with a lock-up period of 1 year partial repayment penalty and 1 year full repayment penalty.

In both cases, the original cash rebate promised, at time of signing loan, is forfeited. In both cases, new loan is based on SIBOR, rather than the bank's own Mortgage Rate and are a decent saving on the original packages from a year and a half ago, but not as much as you would expect, given that SIBOR has halved.

Meeting 1: Presented with the packages by Bank Officer 1. Write in to request a waiver of the penalty fee, particularly a waiver of the penalty fee on the undisbursed segment of the loan as it is ridiculous that I am being charged on the undisbursed segment of the loan and that I'm being charged at all, considering the whole point of this exercise is Not to move banks, despite that you have sold me a varying mortgage that managed to neither vary nor reflect any economic realities.

Bank Officer 1: Superior has granted 1% penalty from 1.5% penalty fee and only on disbursed amount of loan. I clarify that taking the second package means I will get cash back from the bank. Yes, she says.

Bank Officer 2: Calls to say that this is the best they can offer and denies that 1% rebate offsetting now less-than-1%-of-total-loan is a positive cash credit to me. No such thing. There is so, I say and Bank Officer 1 promised it. I clarified, I say.

Bank Officer 2: Calls me back the same night. Ok, done she says. Sends email with new loan details. Except new loan details state "Partial repayment penalty - nil". Ok, I email back, done. Send email few minutes later saying by the way, I'm happy there's no partial repayment penalty.

Bank Officer 1: Has send new loan document but there is an error. Apologises, sends second loan document and says will backdate the form as SIBOR has now moved up 0.1%

Bank Officer 1: I notice second loan document says "Penalty fee will be charged if loan is fully repaid within 2 years of signing". I call Bank Officer 1 back and say, hang on, that's within 1 year of signing. She claims bank has never signed a loan with a 1 year full repayment penalty, only 2 years. She insists it's two years, insists, insists, insists.

Bank Officer 2/Bank Officer 1: I am getting upset. I tell them I just checked the hard copy document I saved from our first meeting. I was sleepy this morning, but not that sleepy, I say, I am very sure I'm right. Stop short of demanding compensation or error fee if I am right. Ask poor Z to find, scan and email the original hardcopy document from the first visit to the finance center, which I have luckily saved.

Bank Officer 2/Bank Officer 1: Document says "within 1 year of signing", luckily there are blue pen marks to show where Bank Office 1 illustrated terms and there aren't any on that particular contract term. Bank officers very apologetic. Never, she said Never. Now she says that that day, it happens she was using a February term sheet when I had gone to see her in May and the terms were different back then. Tell them in objectively phrased email that "I don't feel customer should have to prove their own veracity and I am very upset at the delays. If I can remember the terms in full, I don't see why it is so difficult." In the meantime, the first month of the mortgage has in theory passed but has not been interest-charged.

This is still a black hole of time and energy.